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Transitioning into liminal space

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(no subject) [Jul. 17th, 2019|07:17 am]
Transitioning into liminal space
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[State of Being |okayokay]

I was looking forward to getting my UPS set up with the new batteries all day at work yesterday. When I got home and did, the unit made a soft popping sound and lots of magic smoke came out. I opened it up and found a very toasted capacitor.

That crashed my mood really hard. I had the whole set of depressive thoughts about how dumb I am and how I can't fix anything right, and I took the dog to bed for snuggles and a nap. Danae came in later and pointed out that I *did* fix the Marantz, that I've fixed other things, that so many people just throw stuff out without trying, and that she loves me for the way I care. That helped a lot, and today I am feeling mostly rational again.

That seems to be the way I am when I am recovering from a depressive span. I'll be feeling ok, but some minor setback can crash my brain for the rest of the day.

I'm still feeling frustrated about spending $30 on batteries that I may not have a use for. But I'm going to try replacing the damaged caps in the UPS (a second is obviously toast too), make sure I'm connecting the batteries correctly, and see if I can get it to work. Maybe the fried cap will have acted as a fuse and saved other things from whatever happened?

They're 200volt, 33 microfarad capacitors. Maybe I can find them as part of a kit so I'm not paying five times more in shipping than I am for the components.
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(no subject) [Jul. 14th, 2019|07:08 pm]
Transitioning into liminal space
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[State of Being |accomplishedaccomplished]

Then I took apart the dead monitor I've had on my desk for a few months since it stopped working. The internet pointed me at the power supply board and I found obviously bad caps with bulging tops there. I have a replacement cap kit coming, and the monitor is sitting in pieces on my desk, in a hopefully easy-to-reassemble pile.

I've successfully worked on and diagnosed a stereo receiver, a UPS, a CD changer, and a monitor today and am waiting for parts to finish off three of them (the UPS just needed new batteries). None of it required high levels of skill and problem-solving; just patience and references. But I'm pretty content with that.
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(no subject) [Jul. 14th, 2019|04:37 pm]
Transitioning into liminal space
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[State of Being |accomplishedaccomplished]

The CD changer was straight-forward, and was exactly what I expected. The table drive belts are stretched and pop right off of their pulleys after I remount them. I just ordered a set that should be here in a week. Until then, the unit and several piles of CDs will be sitting around my workshop.
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(no subject) [Jul. 14th, 2019|03:45 pm]
Transitioning into liminal space
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[State of Being |accomplishedaccomplished]

All the lamps are working on the 2270! I cleaned it too; so shiny! Next I'm going to troubleshoot my 300 disc CD changer while trying not to spill 150-ish CDs all over the floor.

I should get down on top of this thing with my super-wide lens and see if I can make it look weird. Making things look weird is one of my primary photographic motivations.

My 300 disc CD changer with the lid removed.
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(no subject) [Jul. 14th, 2019|01:53 pm]
Transitioning into liminal space
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[State of Being |accomplishedaccomplished]

This is the dial string that actuates the tuning capacitors and moves the pointing needle across the face of the dial. The large wheel in the lower right is the tuning wheel on the front panel of the stereo. I ended up having to take it off of a couple pulleys as I worked, but fortunately did not have to restring it entirely. I brushed my soldering iron against it once too; eep!

The dial string on my Marantz 2270 Receiver.
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(no subject) [Jul. 14th, 2019|01:24 pm]
Transitioning into liminal space
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[State of Being |accomplishedaccomplished]

Analog electronics are beautiful. What do you buy anymore that has physical gears in it?

This is the tuning section of my Marantz 2270. The rows of discs are variable capacitors for tuning. Rotating discs alternate with stationary discs to provide variable capacitance.

I believe the set of three on the left are AM and the five on the right are FM.

The tunings section of my Marantz 2270 receiver.
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Organized Workshop [Jul. 13th, 2019|11:40 pm]
Transitioning into liminal space
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[State of Being |okayokay]

It took a while, but I finally did things today. I got my workshop organized and finished building the radio kit that's been languishing on my desk for months. It's late to start on it today, but I put my Marantz 2270 on the desk. Tomorrow I hope to replace the burned out lights and the rest of the vellum behind the front panel. While it's open, I'll hook my scope up to the power bus behind the big filter caps just to see if it looks relatively clean. I don't know how to do much more than that right now.

The Coca-Cola crate is Lisa's and is full of her records. On top of it is another of my vintage receivers, a 60 watt-per-channel Sherwood S8900-A in the factory faux-wood cabinet. That was another thrift store find. It was from a down-market SA tagged at something like $30, and there was a half-off electronics sale so I paid $15. I borrowed my Klipsch speakers from the living room to connect to it and have been playing music from my phone while I work. The unit was made in Chicago, and was Sherwood's last unit made here in the US. Having local history connections to my gear makes me happy. I haven't done any work on it; it's powered up and played just fine since I bought it.

I think working on repairing some stuff might help me not want to just lie around and do nothing. Fixing things makes me feel good about myself.

My workship after getting it organized over the last couple of days.
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(no subject) [Jul. 13th, 2019|11:37 pm]
Transitioning into liminal space
[Tags|, ]
[State of Being |okayokay]

I posted this on Facebook this morning, but the work of embedding a link into the text seemed like too much work to post it here too. That's where my brain was.

From this morning:

There's this article headlined "Climate Despair Is Making People Give Up on Life."


That's basically where I am these days I think.

I know something needs to be done. In small, tangential part, I was going to address that via being involved in urban public policy, but that did not come to be.

I've been talking with my therapist a lot about how doing any number of forward-looking things requires a certain fundamental optimism about the future. I'm realizing that maybe I just don't have that. It is significantly affecting my mental health, and I don't see a way to resolve the issue because it's completely external to me. Not feeling depressed and to some degree hopeless feels irrational, and I'm not very good at prioritizing my feelings over my rational analysis of a situation in *any* context.

I'm home over this four-day weekend when I already had a fully planned out trip to see a bunch of the kinds of things I've always loved seeing on the kind of road trip I've always loved taking. I can't say exactly why; I just couldn't get excited about it, other than in fits and starts. I just want to hole up with people and animals I care about and be insular.

And I *have* been taking my brain meds. I shudder to think how I'd be without them.
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Road Trip Uncertainty [Jul. 11th, 2019|12:43 pm]
Transitioning into liminal space
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I'm swinging wildly back and forth about this trip. Do I want to go? Do I want to stay home and have a few days at home with my partner and do cleaning and electronics work, and maybe take a few long bike rides? Do I want to just take a couple of day trips to nearby places like Starved Rock or Kettle Moraine?

I don't know. Maybe I should just start driving south after therapy and give it an hour or two. if I don't feel like continuing, I can always turn around. I have something here to talk about in therapy too.

A little more mental stability right now would be nice.
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Traveling Dog [Jul. 10th, 2019|02:44 pm]
Transitioning into liminal space
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[State of Being |hopefulhopeful]

I have my trip basically planned out. And I'm 99% sure I'm going to go. Lack of motivation and excitement for doing much other than staying home was depression and anxiety, I'm doing better now, and once I'm on the road I'm sure I'll be happy and excited.

12 of the things I'm seeing are some kind of commemoration of death (and one of those includes a cemetery with multiple interesting things to see). Death really compels people toward the shaping of social memory. There are far fewer things that commemorate births, though one of my stops is the the birthplace of David Rice Atchison. He may have been (but probably actually wasn't) president of the United States for about a day. He was also a pro-slavery domestic terrorist, like so many of the time's Democrats. He got more personally involved than many, though, during the violence in Bleeding Kansas.

There are a lot of monuments commemorating some pretty vile, to modern progressive sensibilities, people and things in Kentucky.

I am going to visit a place called Wolf Lick. Not because anything is there, but because I am a furry and must pose. Awooo!

If you feel like spending four days driving to bizarre things completely on my schedule and sleeping in a car, let me know and we'll talk?
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